


Tower of Strength

by tocasia



Series: Our Shining Past [48]
Category: Final Fantasy VII
Genre: #sailthecosmos, AU, Angst, Dark, Fear of loss, Gen, I reject your reality and substitute my own, Implied Torture, Insanity, Mind Games, Nightmares, Sephiroth and Zack friendship, Sleep talking, Stream of Consciousness, The Sleeping Forest, Wutai, always looking out for your friends, and then there was plot?, bad day, dreams or maybe not, loneliness but don't tell him that, parts of the model are missing, residual traces of tarot card symbolism, walking away from explosions slightly unapologetically
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-11
Updated: 2018-06-14
Packaged: 2019-05-21 00:05:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,676
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14904722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tocasia/pseuds/tocasia
Summary: "Do you think dreams mean anything, Zack?""Not usually.""What about the ones that feel so real you can't tell the difference?"(54. tower) for Seph&Zack Friendship 100 ThemesUpdated with the continuation: To Tower Above Castles in the Sky





	1. Tower of Strength

The meeting was nothing special?

Sephiroth was late. Normally, only Tseng was there before him.

He had no time to take a seat. President Shinra was already dictating.

"We'll dismantle the project over the course of three years. No new applicants will be accepted into SOLDIER. To maintain order in Midgar and Junon, we'll rely on the Public Safety and Administrative Research departments."

"Ah, Sephiroth. You decided to show up. Splendid. I trust you've started the paperwork and expunged all unnecessary expenditures?"

"You're scrapping the SOLDIER program?" Incredulity so intense could not be hidden.

President Shinra narrowed his piggy blue eyes. His face, flushed red and puffy, lent them good contrast.

"After the most recent... incident, we have no choice! Have you no self-control? You've made the populace too scared to buy anything except disaster preparedness kits! Your failure simply cannot be tolerated any longer."

Sephiroth grit his teeth. What crazed accusation was this? He didn't make mistakes. "What incident?"

There were horrified gasps. As if the Shinra board were capable of that emotion.

Tseng said quietly, "Sector 7. You won't believe the cleanup job we had to pull."

No further clarification appeared to be forthcoming.

"To the next item of business. General Heidegger will lead the assault on Fort Condor."

"Heidegger's a fool."

Fort Condor could hardly be classified as a threat. Their strategy was entirely defensive, the resources they guarded obtainable elsewhere. They hadn't restricted access to the most valuable commodity: one could gather the Condor's dropped feathers from the surrounding plains unharassed.

Killing the Condor made no sense. It was the best source of phoenix downs on the continent, without which the military would suffer, no longer able to train to their fullest. Civilian medicine would also be affected. Was Shinra so eager to re-embrace wartime scarcity? Surely any economic gains would be false?

Expert predictions indicated the materia inside the reactor would be junk anyway, unsuitable for Scarlet's purposes.

And yet... he had no personal qualms wiping Fort Condor off the map; he'd probably enjoy it. Maybe that should be sickening. Rationally, the wastefulness of it was.

"Your opinion is noted. Nevertheless, it will be done," President Shinra decreed.

"Allow me the command then! Under _competent_ leadership, our losses will be lessened."

Why was everyone looking at him so condescendingly?

Oh.

Because the true objective was.... Fort Condor had nothing to do with it.

...When had he been reduced to begging to oversee the culling of his own troops in an engineered disaster?

"You?" Rufus sneered, "You command only a handful of obsolete lab rats. That's all SOLDIER is, a failed experiment. Didn't they tell you? You never earned your position. You can't save those worthless animals."

Shocked beyond description, Sephiroth turned desperately to Professor Hojo for support.

"It's over, boy. Scarlet's robo-soldiers are the future. All you are now is spare parts. I'll do my best to make you useful."

Sephiroth balled his hands into fists, trying to stop the shaking anger. He _must not_ draw Masamune here; they'd view it as evidence of his instability....

With great determination and legendary stoicism, he kept his voice steady. "What of the Promised Land? Without SOLDIER, how will we conquer it if there is resistance?"

"So much for your boasts of not needing backup during Wutai!" Heidegger roared, halfway to a guffaw. "And you couldn't even _find_ the Promised Land!"

"I never claimed..."

President Shinra cleared his throat. "General Heidegger is in command of the Fort Condor operation because you refused the order, Sephiroth."

"How could I have refused when this is the first I've heard of it?"

"Regardless of your earlier decision, your current ...confusion... doesn't recommend you for the role. To be quite honest, we were going to assign it to... who is he again? your second-in-command? but we couldn't find him anywhere. You should keep a better eye on your subordinates. It's unfortunate that we didn't investigate your mismanagement sooner."

Ridiculous. The insults were ridiculous! "You will apologize and say something reasonable in your defense, or..."

"Shut up, Sephiroth. Since you aren't willing to do your job, you are hereby relieved of duty. You are stripped of all titles and rank. You are dismissed."

* * *

Sephiroth was totally stunned. Never would he have imagined they'd so thoroughly unmake him!

He'd put it off as long as possible, striving for contentment in hard-won peace, living a comfortable lie of his own construction, wishing every day it was enough when it was not.

Why had they forced his hand?

Would he bow his head to this man once more, knowing he possessed the power to decline? No. He could not stand the disgrace they wanted him to bear.

Did he want to take over Shinra? Not particularly. He hadn't felt the need to make it official before, and didn't now, not when the larger office promised to be a similarly stagnant trap.

Would he miss them, if they were dead?

Not really. 

* * *

"I think you will find..." _General_ Sephiroth slowly raised his arm. He had their full attention. One small gesture more and he always would. "...you haven't the authority."

In deference to his will, flames hungry for liberation shared his indignation.

The window glass exploded outwards. 

It was too hot, too fast. They had nothing else to add. Meeting adjourned.

The pretentiously glossy table melted, bubbling, made of cheap plastic after all. The fire sprinklers couldn't come on; liquid metal dripped from what remained of the ceiling, amber glow hissing on blackened vintage floorboards. Why had they covered that with carpet?

 _General_ Sephiroth watched the ashes of Shinra's top executives, and possibly the Company itself, blow away in the wind.

...the bits he wasn't brushing off his coat.

So. Where hadn't he visited lately? Bone Village was nice this time of year.

He probably had time to shower first.

...and tell Zack.

That's right, Zack was on a mission. He was in Wutai, being diplomatic. A text would work.

Now that he'd washed his hands of Shinra, which helicopter did he like best?

* * *

In his office, Zack finished signing stock cadet graduation awards. Finally! It was dark outside. He deserved some celebration of his own, or at least a break. 

He reached for his third-favorite coffee mug, the one with the mustachioed cactuar. Courageous inspection revealed grungy sludge inside. Gross. How long had it been sitting there? Hopefully no one had noticed. He'd go rinse it out in the bathroom down the hall.

He had to walk past the General's office to get there. It sounded like Seph was talking in his sleep again. There wasn't anybody else around, and it wasn't the phone.

"They couldn't take that from me. It's so absurd; I wouldn't even get angry. I would just laugh at them... ...wouldn't I?"

He didn't have to be alarmed, exactly. Sephiroth sometimes talked in his sleep when he crashed on Zack's couch. But... he seemed pretty distressed tonight. Zack gave himself permission to worry.

The door was ajar, so he risked a glance inside the room for confirmation.

Sephiroth had his head resting on his desk, folded arms for a pillow.

"Send Lieutenant General Fair up to my office. I wish to congratulate him on his promotion."

Sweet. Maybe it wasn't a nightmare? But they'd discussed it; his friend would rather be woken in this situation. Seph did the same for him when he was thrashing through his dream memories of Wutai.

Zack set the coffee mug on a nearby chair. He should avoid direct touch; SOLDIER reflexes could trigger before conscious awareness intervened. He tapped softly on a corner of the desk and gave it a little nudge, ready to jump back, just in case.

"Hey Seph. It's me."

Gaea, but it was fast! With no real movement, Sephiroth snapped awake and stared him down. Trapped in that brilliant turquoise Mako glare, any _possibility_ of the _thought_ of escape evaporated. Neat trick. Zack had never quite gotten the hang of inflicting terrified helplessness with a _look_. He'd decided he could live with not being that intimidating.

"It's me," Zack repeated, completely unfazed. Yeah.

"Lock the door."

Zack did.

"Lieutenant General Fair, I order you to seize control of this company and install yourself as President and make the world a better place. Institute social, economic, and environmental reforms as you see fit. With my support you have a full dictatorship."

Whoa. Where had _that_ come from? "Wow, uh... Sir, I know you probably think this is hilarious, but I gotta ask. Is this a serious order or one of your games?"

"I don't know."

Huh? This was the part where Sephiroth ought to be telling him his expression was _priceless_.

"They want to take away all that I am! They think they can do that! Can you imagine the arrogance? Confusing my current acceptance of the status quo with submission... when on a whim, I can destroy them _utterly_."

Zack listened for more context. Maybe he could help if he figured out which dream it was.

"Go to the conference room on the 66th floor, slice off a piece of the table, and bring it to me. I want to check its composition."

Ah. The classic the-Shinra-board-has-an-unfortunate-accident scenario. They'd been over this before.

"It's solid mahogany, Seph. It was a dream. You were asleep."

"How are you sure? I tried to convince myself, but...."

Time for reality check number one.

"'Cause I know you wouldn't abandon SOLDIER."

"I would never...!"

"I know. It's okay. So you must've had a plan, right? For afterwards?"

 "...I didn't."

"That's gotta be a dream then. You always have a plan."

Sephiroth seemed to consider this for a while, but he didn't look relieved enough.

So Zack continued, "Yeah, and we've got a good life here in HQ. You wouldn't throw it away just like that and leave the world in chaos, leaderless. As far as I know, nothing is going on with Fort Condor, and if you proposed a policy change in front of the board, they'd listen to you."

"True.... I shouldn't discard those who are performing adequately. And... although they might not realize it, I functionally already hold the power I would gain by killing them...."

"Pretty much. See? You wouldn't, so you didn't." Well done, Zack! Now his friend would wake up the rest of the way and...

"But if I don't, then how will I rescue you? I won't be in the right place to find you. I won't remember the proper ending. And then I won't be able to fix it.... What happened to you will be my fault, because..."

"Whoa, Seph, slow down. What are you talking about?"

"I wanted to save you, so I dreamt you were in danger." 

"What happened to me?" Zack spoke cautiously. This was new territory.

Sephiroth shook his head and didn't answer, eyes shut tight.

"That bad huh?" So, uh, probably something between 'they tortured you for years' and 'you died'. Yikes. "It's just a dream though. I'm still here. I'm here, okay? I'm here with you."

"Yes. You are."

"We're here in your office in HQ, where it's safe. It's late. Do you want me to walk with you to your apartment?"

"You'll come with me?"

"Of course, Seph. Let's go."

Sephiroth rose and straightened the papers on his desk, turned off the light and locked the door, and followed Zack into the hallway.

"Thank you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Tower is commonly interpreted as meaning danger, crisis, sudden change, destruction, higher learning, and liberation. In the Rider-Waite deck, the top of the Tower is a crown, which symbolizes materialistic thought being brought low. (From Wikipedia)
> 
> I think the Tower is a very Sephiroth tarot card.
> 
> Earlier versions of this story had more of that symbolism and more dreams-but-maybe-not and more overdramatic insane destruction. Sephiroth's nightmares ran away with the plot. A lot of it didn't make sense. Dreams don't have to make sense (and neither does reality, according to Jenova) but the ones I write about should fit the prompt.
> 
> So now it's sort of like... Zack is Sephiroth's tower of strength. And that's better.


	2. To Tower Above Castles in the Sky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the continuation of Tower of Strength. I wasn't sure whether to post this or not, so I did.

Zack walked with Sephiroth to his apartment.

Sephiroth stopped at the door. "Do you want to hear the rest? Of the nightmare."

"Sure. You listen to mine all the time."

"First... did the pagoda of the Five Mighty Gods in Wutai ever burn during the war?"

Zack tried not to look at him weird. "No sir. They repelled us, remember? And they could've just put out the fire with Leviathan."

Sephiroth sounded surprisingly relieved. "Come in."

* * *

The Shinra helicopter landed on the outskirts of Bone Village, kicking up winds that returned snow to the bitter, frosty dawn.

About damn time for the monthly resupply! There'd be coffee and MRE's, and ammo to hunt the Bandersnatches with. Pencils for the seismographs, because the pens always froze up. And Tony's care package from his wife. You'd do all kinds of favors for those cookies. It was hopelessly sinful.

Normally they'd run out to greet the pilot and any new arrivals and assist with the cargo, but....

The figure exiting the cockpit and striding towards them was unmistakable.

Unless the Great General Sephiroth had taken to delivering mail, this wasn't the shipment they were expecting!

Alex swallowed nervously. If what they'd heard on the radio could be believed, it would be _extremely unwise_ to ask after the General's business. Just like in Wutai, it'd be best to stand at attention and do your damnedest to telegraph more respect than fear.

Sephiroth paused a few meters from their camp, seemingly unarmed.

"Are you going to try to stop me?" The Great General's voice bore no trace of mockery and did not bother with threat.

"No Sir."

"Good."

Later, he didn't know what had possessed him to do it, how he'd worked up the courage.

"Sir? I wondered if I may shake your hand. The world'll be better off with what you've done."

General Sephiroth looked him in the eye. Gaea! He'd thought himself accustomed to the impervious glare of SOLDIER! He'd never felt so small....

"You served in Wutai. Corporal Alex Nathaniel Sanford. 425th Infantry Division, correct?"

"Yessir!" His heart swelled with something more complex than pride. Though he'd earned no medals, he was remembered!

The Great General offered his hand.

They shook. Alex marveled at the gentleness of it.

The Great General climbed the ladder up to the first level of the excavation. The guys on guard duty didn't drop their salutes until he disappeared into the trees, silver and black against green.

"Did he have a harp? He's gonna get lost."

"Watch your mouth. Remember who you're talking about."

"Uh, that's not really something you forget, boss."

"Do you think he'll come back for the helicopter?"

"500 gil says he doesn't."

"No deal. But we'd better not touch it, anyway."

* * *

It was true he could not get lost here. Mother told him so. She also thought he should've blown up the whole building.

He asked her why but maybe she wasn't listening. Was she ignoring him? Had he done something wrong?

She was supposed to laugh and say, _You can do no wrong, for their laws do not apply to you._

Or hum pleasantly in approval of his curiosity, the way she did whenever he asked her anything. Or chastise him for not already knowing.

But she was silent, and he was alone.

He wanted to turn around and check if he was being followed. Did the Sleeping Forest sleep, or did it hunt him, or did he hunt it? Within a towering canopy of latticed branches, obscuring the substance of the sky, layers rending base geometry... _There_ was the path, wound unbroken through the trees, well-worn with stars, built on recollections of a city made out of seashells, locked in time, waiting for ruin, to be more fallen than Shinra. A ravine carved deep in thought, it finds a specific ending and recreates the first forever. Secretly safe to stray from entirely, a truth bereft of waking mystery: for him the path is everywhere.

But anyone can get dream-lost.

He took a step, disorienting.

* * *

He stood on the sculptured palm of Da-chao, held up in the highest of heavens, direction of the wind never his inconvenience. Masamune caught the sun.

Sephiroth looked at the pagoda burning in the valley below, the last remnant of the nation he'd conquered, and wondered why he'd spared it.

In a daze, he chose leisurely long strides, swinging Masamune in front of him, sweeping Garudas and Foulanders from the mountain, and if the monsters had human faces, what did it matter? Draw slow-motion red ribbons in the air! Sign his name! If the force of his strikes didn't carry the bodies over the edge, flung off of Masamune's bloodless blade or sliced in twain because they were nothing but pieces anyway, he shoved them over, alive or not, a kick as merciless as the sword, to end the same. He wanted to watch them fall...

And then he knew he was laughing, breathing in smoke, ash, breath, life!

And he didn't have to care!

No, but I _do._

Why?

It was imperative that he find Zack, who could tell him why he should.

He glimpsed a vision of a truth.

"You tried to rescue them... but they gunned you down!"

He had to walk _faster_ , he should run, he should _fly_ , he should already be where Zack was!

Zack, who was trapped, stuck in a cage....

Buried in a heap of corpses! Miles and miles and miles of them... or maybe just a few.

For years and years and years.... 

It was the kind of beating that was meticulously calculated to come closest to death. In service to someone's pleasure, to be mended with magic and repeated soon after. SOLDIER healing helped, but meant they didn't have to wait as long between. There was no sound, but Sephiroth had seen this before. He had done this before. It was beyond the screaming stage. All the other prisoners were dead. The weight of their bodies jammed the cage release mechanism.

But of course Zack would still be alive. Other than that was not allowed. 

General Sephiroth advanced through the streets of Wutai, and they bowed for him.

And here was the house...

The house that shamed Leviathan.

* * *

What was the point of such displays, such excessive showcases of suffering?

Sephiroth stared down at his broken friend. It's amazing what some can endure and survive.

No amputations. Both eyes intact, and one day they would be bright again. Zack's only scars would be psychological, likely made worse by the Mako, much harder to heal.

But never impossible. Never that.

Sephiroth crouched and maneuvered Zack into a fireman's carry. There was no reason to stay here, in this court of damnation strewn with shurikens, fox statues presiding.

* * *

It wasn't the monsoon season. They didn't have to worry about flash floods.

He was less tired than he expected. Zack weighed almost nothing.

Monsters stalked him, emboldened by their assumption of his burden. Stupid creatures, worthy of extinction. He charred some of the not-so-foul-tasting meat so it wouldn't spoil, before tossing it away. Unnecessary.

Because.... This was a dream, wasn't it?

The little lightning birds fought over the scraps, tiny feathers raining from the sky.

There was no cover in the wastes, no trees or vegetation, barren even of ruined structures' memories; a particularly prideful accomplishment buried years in the past. The two of them would be easy to spot from the air, if someone was looking.

Of course someone would be.

Sephiroth decided he wouldn't need anything from the wreckage.

He'd gathered the energy before realizing what it was for, which spell it was. In his hand something of the endless horizon, a piece of the shell of the world, a sphere of electric blue expanding from seed of brilliant white. Threshold reached in an instant; deathly desire manifest. The wide beam sheared straight, vicious, and grounded itself in the target, laser trajectory spawning pinpoint bursts, empty explosions to puncture blue haze ascendant.

Without a pilot, the helicopter died spiraling, blades destined to slash the earth, crash inevitable, precise, fiery skid trail satisfactory. Shrapnel deflected, harm to Zack denied, Sephiroth walked away from tumbling clouds of dust and black smoke, flair for the dramatic temporarily appeased. Although perhaps they'd have reached their destination faster if he'd commandeered the vehicle, instead. Oh well.

What do you think Mother? Shall we call it the scenic route?

She didn't answer him. Fine. He'd talk to Zack.

"You and I alone, it's the same as when we met. Do you remember? Side by side on the field of glory! These same stars witnessed our victory. And you had the right to know that... to know.... Do you know what your name means, Zack?"

Slung over his shoulder at the moment, Zack's unconscious form of course said nothing.

"I wish you could answer. I don't want to talk only to myself anymore."

"I'm going to bring you back, you know. I promised."

"I know I can, under the right conditions. I'm sorry you have to wait."

"I have to wait that long too..."

"...to learn if we're still friends."

* * *

This journey to Wutai's southern coast and then east across the islands didn't have to be so far. Really, it was no distance at all.

* * *

Zack woke up, bleary eyed, wrapped in dusty leather, at night, at one of their little campsites by the sea. The clear sky told him it was a cold night; he should be able to see his breath. Sephiroth sat nearby, bare shoulders and arms, back turned, his damn gorgeous silver hair covering it like a cloak, the softest of orange light dancing around him... shadows and comfortable heat extending to where Zack lay. His own uniform was tattered strips and rags, not grimy, gentle on his skin... but the purple was a rusty red with bloodstains from when they'd....

So he was in a cold wasteland at night, lying down on Sephiroth's coat, close to Sephiroth, who was keeping them warm with magic, who must've also taken care of him with magic, washed him, cleaned his uniform and dressed him and the wounds that weren't there anymore, because Sephiroth had rescued him from where they'd....

"Where are we going?"

"Temple of the Ancients," Sephiroth said.

"Sounds nice."

* * *

"Why were we going to the Temple of the Ancients?" Zack asked.

"I think it was because.... They have excellent hotsprings there."

"Are you sure you're alright, Seph?"

"I am when you are here."

"Should I stay over?"

"You're welcome to. But you don't have to. Knowing you would is enough."

"See you tomorrow then."

"Goodnight."


End file.
